How to Say "I Love You" to Your Spouse

With Valentines day just around the corner, and the abundance of ah hmm....nauseating commercials begging you to man up and buy your girl a diamond heart necklace (we no longer have TV but I remember those commercials and doubt they are any different these days) what is a man (or woman) to do come this day of love and romance? Here are a few tips on how to say I love You in a way that counts.

1. Be a person of character, honor each other above yourself, don't lie, don't cheat, don't steal, let your yes be yes and your no be no, love God with all your heart! This is a great way to say I love you.

2. Live passionately and with purpose, and encourage your spouse to do the same.You can make a difference is this world, you can bless others and be blessed by giving your self to others (especially your mate), you can't do that so well if you are living a hum drum could care less existence.

3. Think, think, think, about your spouse and ways to encourage, affirm, bless and help him or her be all they were designed to be, be each others allies and don't forget who the real enemy is, *hint...it's not your spouse!
 
4. Pray hard! Everyday for each other. Never stop doing this! Ever!
 
5. Learn what your role is, husbands and and wives each play a vital (and different) role in marriage. Be a student of what this looks like in your marriage and make sure that your role and living that out is your top priority, we can only be responsible for our own actions. I once read somewhere that if we both give %90 and only expect %10 in return we usually will end up about 50/50...


6. Confess your sins... to God and to each other, make sure you are allowing yourself to be vulnerable, yes... I know this is risky, you could get hurt right? but true deep and mature love is not possible without this important element!

7. Have fun, be friends, laugh, enjoy each others company, foster great moments, show grace toward each other and forgive, forgive, forgive!

Flowers, cards and gifts are of course a great way to show your spouse you love them on Valentines day (or any day for that matter), but they should only be an expression of a deeper and truer love that is nurtured day by day, fought for and prayed for. This is truly how you say "I Love You" to your spouse.

Happy Valentines day Ryan! I still cho cho choose you after all these years!