My friend Ashley Weis has a blog called More Than Desire that is dedicated to bringing hope to women who have been damaged by the betrayal of their spouse's addiction to pornography and other sexual sins. Recently Ashley has started a new web site that is not quite off the ground yet called "Love Letters to Porn Stars" she has asked women, who's marriages have been damaged by the devastating effects of pornography to contribute personal letters to the site, her desire is to love the women trapped in the porn industry with the love of Christ, to be different, to be the hands and feet of Jesus and love one another, even our "enemies". Below is the letter I submitted for her to use on the site. Her vision is to get enough money raised that she would be able to make care packages with the many wives letters hand written out that she can send and hand deliver at places like porn conventions.
Dear Beautiful,
Did you know that you are beautiful? And not just for what your body looks like either. You are beautiful because you were made by a loving God who is the very essence of beauty, and when He fashioned you, He made you in His image. When He created you, He smiled because He knew that what He created was good, He knew this world would want to use you, to defile you, to take your true beauty and make it ugly, to take your innocence and smash it, your heart and break it.
He still loves you, He still thinks you are beautiful, and His heart is now breaking because of the lies you have swallowed and the life you are not caught up in. When I thought about how I would be able to write this letter, a love letter to you, I thought why would I want to do that? How could I do that? After all my husband was unfaithful to me with you. He chose you over me for his pleasure many times, and I sat here naive, believing him when he told me that he only had eyes for me, after all, who are you to him? You did not give birth to his 3 children. You don’t know him or love him, you haven’t stuck by him through thick and thin.
I resented you, resented the fact that you put your body out there for good men, husbands and fathers to feast there weak eyes upon, when they struggle to stay pure for God and their families. I asked God, “How? How will I be able to love these women?” And then, I looked at my two beautiful daughters playing in the backyard, and it occurred to me, that is who you are. You are little girls that are beautiful, little girls that got so very lost along the way. God loves you so much He can’t stop thinking about you, you are His daughters, and it pains Him deeply that you have allowed yourself to be used to be the garbage of this world, thinking perhaps you would get that place of longing inside of you filled this way, and now that you haven’t, God is still there, still waiting for you to come to His open arms.
He will never love you with a love that is impure, He will never use you for evil, He will never turn you away, He will never be unfaithful to you, He loves you. Period. I forgive you. You are not who I thought you were. You are not who you think you are either. God bless you beautiful!
Love,
Michelle
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